La fuite

Someone had a massive telling-off from his daddy this week, after disappearing out at The Front and being gone all night.

To make matters worse, Cat Daddy had planned a big bike ride for the next morning and, of course, a poor night’s sleep stressing about an idiot cat isn’t exactly the best preparation for such a thing. The little sod did this on purpose.

I woke up that morning to the sound of faraway screaming, and I knew in an instant that Louis Catorze was out at The Front. Sure enough, when I opened the front door, he dashed in, bellowing indignantly, then headed straight for his glass of water.

I called up to Cat Daddy to let him know that he’d dropped the ball again (because he was the one who’d been on Late Shift after I‘d gone to bed), and he replied, “Thank God!” Then came the full story of the previous night’s fiasco:

Usually, if we sit in the front room with the window open, we can keep an eye on Catorze as he sits on the window sill and surveys his royaume. However, that night, very unusually, he’d decided to do a runner and hide.

Cat Daddy went out twice with his torch during the early hours of that morning, peering into neighbours’ gardens and bins – all the while fully aware that such behaviour usually results in the police being called – but there was no sign of Catorze. Now, if you’re at The Front at that time of the night/morning and a member of your family is out there looking for you, you cannot possibly be unaware of it. Unless, of course, you are a horrid little shite who is deliberately trying not to be found.

Eventually, at 1:25am, Cat Daddy came home empty-handed and went to bed. He usually sleeps very well but he had a terrible night, wondering if every sound was Catorze in distress and mentally planning the distribution of the “Missing” posters.

Anyway, by some miracle Sa Maj actually hadn’t bothered any of the neighbours during his overnight jaunt, although Cat Daddy sleepily overheard “an exchange of some sort” when the Abel and Cole parcel came at around 7am, and he now wonders if perhaps Catorze had accosted the delivery man. And we have agreed that our boy now needs a Front Curfew: 10pm on normal nights, possibly earlier on troublesome nights such as Friday 13th, Hallowe’en or a full moon.

This is worse than being the parents of a wayward teenager.

*EDIT: The night that we agreed the curfew time, Catorze actually returned of his own accord through the front window at 9:57pm. Cat Daddy and I found this satisfying yet also creepy beyond belief.

On which foot should we put the electronic tag?

18 thoughts on “La fuite

    1. There are no cars whatsoever at The Back, so Sa Maj can come and go there freely. But he has no way of coming indoors from The Front (apart from those two or three times when he magically teleported) so, if he’s there, he needs to be in by the time we go to bed. 😐

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Oh I can’t tell you how many times I have called and searched and prayed for a missing cat and realized that they could be sitting anywhere in the shade of some bushes – in midday sun – and just Not. Coming. Home.
    I have also done night vigils/searches and found it was helpful to use one of those caps with lights set into the brim (usually sold in the hunting/ sporting goods ) The lights are almost on a level with your own eyes and they show up the eye shine of an animal very well. So even if you don’t find the cat, you get an idea of what else is out there.

    So glad he is safely home.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I was just thinking you should get one of those Cube trackers for him. It’s small enough for a cat and may give you peace of mind. It needs to be in Bluetooth range but if your neighbors have the app they will all work together to keep track of the little bugger. I think I need one of those for Frankie.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. He is teeny tiny, though. The last time I researched a tracker – which was some time ago – he, erm, didn’t meet the minimum weight requirement. 🤣🤣🤣


  3. MOL and two paws up for Louis Catorze! I believe it is the sacred duty of felines to shake up our humans periodically to remind them how important we are. Bien joué Louis!
    Purrs & Head Bonks,
    Alberto and The Tribe

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I suspect Catorze may be on the lookout for a signal (like Batman does), calling him to Secret Cat Business. In which case it is imperative that he be allowed to respond. Or he may simply have a portal through which he travels through another universe to meet with the Catluminati 🤔

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh, he has a portal all right. I wish we knew where it was. Mind you, it’s probably the kind that can never be found twice by the same person.


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