Author: iamthesunking
-
If you have ever met a British person, you will know that we all have at least one massive plastic carrier bag in our house, filled with numerous smaller plastic carrier bags. It’s practically the law here in the UK to have one of these; any Brit claiming not to is either a liar or…
-
The flimsy, gossamer-thin silver lining of both of us being at home during Louis Catorze’s food bullying is that the impact is halved. However, when it’s just one of us home alone, that person really does feel the full force of it. Whilst I successfully escape and spend my day with the comparatively cushy task…
-
The first of Louis Catorze’s birthday flotilla parties took place on Saturday. Sadly, having worn himself out from screaming all morning, the birthday boy let us down by sleeping through most of it, and his guests barely saw him. Although it wasn’t blazing sunshine by any means, we were still able to sit outside for…
-
I have decided that, rather than ignoring my Oura ring’s passive-aggressive messages telling me to move my lazy arse, I probably ought to start taking some notice. Otherwise there’s not much point in having a fitness tracker. I have started dancing to try and achieve my step target, either when I come home after school…
-
Louis Catorze has figured out that, if he creepy-stares for food during my workout, I won’t respond. Now, before you all start piping up in his defence, this is the way it has to be. If I interrupt him things to give him even one tiny morsel, it will condemn me to a fate of…
-
Cat Daddy and I went to Manchester at the weekend, to watch the football. And it seems that Mancunians are cat people, too: Despite the weekend being non-stop action, we didn’t realise quite how comparatively peaceful was until we stepped back through the door of Le Château, and the screaming started. These are just a…
-
If you had to describe your ideal life, what would it look like? Free food, free board, the best private healthcare, and being able to do what I liked, with nobody calling me out on my shit behaviour. Oh, wait … For more Catorzian capers, please visit http://louiscatorze.com
-
What do you do to be involved in the community? Cat Daddy told me the other day that he had “important neighbourhood news which would permanently change the way we live our lives”. I thought it was going to be about the car parking in our street, or the accursèd number 65 bus which randomly…
-
An Amazon parcel arrived at Le Château the other day. Me: “Is that for me?” Cat Daddy: “No, it’s for Louis.” Me: “It is not.” Him: “Yes, it is. I bought it for him.” Me: “You bought him a present?” Him, on the defensive: “Yes! What’s wrong with that? Can’t I buy my cat a…
-
List the people whom you admire and to whom you look for advice. I don’t have a list. But, if I did, and BBC Weather were on it, they would be firmly crossed off. With opaque permanent marker. Mon Dieu: would you believe that the day-long thunderbolts and lightning forecast for Sunday didn’t happen? The…
-
Thank you so much to everyone who sent birthday wishes to Louis Catorze. Cat Daddy and I made the decision to postpone the Sweet Sixteen party due to the weather. They haven’t just predicted a few showers; it’s an apocalyptic thunderstorm all day, with lightning forecast at 1pm, exactly the time that we had planned…
-
Louis Catorze is sixteen today. And, a few days ago, the lucky boy received a whole side of hot-smoked salmon as a birthday present, from one of his wonderful pilgrims. I was initially against the idea of Catorze having extraneous food whilst being treated for hyperthyroidism. However, since he’s been doing much better on the medication,…
-
It’s Beltane soon and, this year, it coincides with a full moon. These magical big hitters together usually spell trouble in terms of feline madness, and this year is no exception. Rodan climbed next door’s tree and was seen (and heard) massively upsetting a magpie. The humans suspect he was trying to go for the…
-
What are your favourite emojis? Obviously the black cat emoji 🐈⬛ is one of my favourites. And, yes, I am still absolutely enraged that they only introduced it in 2020, whilst the ginger cat, and the weird yellow cat face that looks more like a gerbil, were in existence for years prior to that. However,…
louiscatorze.com 