La nouvelle recrue

Football tournaments are usually a big thing in this household, but I haven’t felt inclined to throw myself into the Qatar World Cup in quite the same way that I have for other tournaments.

However, I have just found out that England defenders Kyle Walker and John Stones have decided to adopt the stray cat who appeared at the England training ground in Qatar. The cat has been named Dave and, at the time of writing this, he is undergoing his medical in preparation for his transfer to Manchester City (read more about it here).

Initially, the players had pledged to take Dave home if England won the World Cup. As you are aware – in fact, if you live in England, you’ll be hearing about very little else for the next four years – that wasn’t to be, but it turns out that they couldn’t bear to be parted from their new feline friend and decided to take him anyway.

Photo from

How is it that the sun can’t shine on the whole world at once, yet The Mothership manages to beam messages to every cat simultaneously? Clearly, whilst telling our U.K. cats to do whatever stupid shit they were doing at 3am, she was also giving step-by-step instructions to Dave to help him impinge his way into the lives of his target humans. Talk about multi-tasking.

“Let them stroke you … that’s good … now look a bit pathetic, as if you haven’t been fed for weeks. Come on, Dave, these dudes are rich. If you can pull this off convincingly, you’ll be set for the rest of your life!”

Photo from

Obviously it’s going to take time and money before Dave’s transfer is complete. And, no doubt, there will be people complaining about wealthy footballers throwing their resources at one overseas cat when there are plenty in the U.K. who need help. But when young, privileged men show kindness to an animal and set an example to the millions of kids who follow them, that’s surely a good thing, non?

Kurt Zouma, are you reading this? THIS is how it’s done, mon coco.

Good luck to Dave in his new life with whichever of his new cat daddies eventually takes him in. Louis Catorze can’t wait to teleport to the housewarming party, especially if lots of men will be invited.

Peace on earth: non. Goodwill to all men: OUAIS.

21 thoughts on “La nouvelle recrue

  1. That IS good news – especially after that other lout. True – they could spend their money on UK cats but – maybe they will make a donation to the RSPCA, and maybe some futbol fans will be inspired to adopt a feline because their heroes did so. Catorze seems to approve.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Nice story, indeed.
    Now, can I ask you a question about the final photo?
    I’m afraid, but isn’t Louis’s odd look in this picture due to the fact that Cat Daddy was wearing a supporter of France’s jacket?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha, no, the shirt was lying across the sofa and Cat Daddy was trying to give him a bit of Boys’ Club roughhousing to get a decent photo! Obviously it didn’t really work.


  3. I vaguely knew about dear Dave and fully expected you to be talking about him, had I had the energy over the last 3 days I would have given you an update! So, for the time being Dave won’t be having to choose between his 2 new daddy’s as they house share, can you imagine the rich boys’ club parties he’ll be able to tell Le Roi about? Maybe you need to keep an eye out just in case Sa Maj starts to expect more from his subjects? I know he expects much from you anyway but look out and be ready to try and preserve whatever you can for yourself as you’re not only a mere female but you’ve not been keeping a grasp on tournament details… As an England follower I always say that if the team that knocks us out wins then there’s no shame to our loss, so come on France, make sure you beat Argentina, although I can say that this England team are young and are made of very promising stuff so look out for what’s to come… And… And marvel that footballers do have goodness at heart and to care for this beautiful boy Dave is an example to those who think it’s funny to be cruel and use innocent pets in their cruel stunts 💙😻💙

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Cat Daddy supports England but, for once, Catorze and I are on the same team in our support of France! Really hoping we beat Argentina!


  4. I was waiting for this post. The ‘Dave item’ also made the news in Belgium and I was wondering if you would write a post about. Let’s be honest, this is more important than England not bringing the Cup home… 😉
    I guess Louis must feel great with France going for a win next Sunday… I’m on his side for sure, don’t really like some players of the other team… 😉

    Liked by 1 person

      1. As you probably remember, cats are very popular in the Belgian news, remember that football player who kicked his cat… It was all over the news over here… 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  5. When I saw the clip and heard that they would take him home IF England won I was quite heartsore. I am so glad that he will have a home.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, I didn’t understand why it would be conditional, especially upon something so unlikely! I’m glad, too, that he has been homed.


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