louiscatorze.com

Je crie, donc je suis

recent posts

about

Sa Majesté Louis Catorze, Le Roi Soleil, supreme ruler of Le Château, sworn enemy of canine foe and scourge of Ocado delivery drivers.

Month: Nov 2021

  • Les yeux sur nous

    A few updates from us at Le Château: I am still alive. This is good news, although I still think death would have been kinder because I now have to live out my days knowing I have indirectly had cat arse in my mouth. And our holiday apartment hosts have emailed Cat Daddy to thank…

  • Un fromage gras nourrit bien des vers

    I am very upset, because I have consumed food from a plate that was licked by Louis Catorze. And, yes, I am fully aware that cats lick their arses. That’s why I am upset. Ordinarily I would die a thousand deaths before anything licked by a cat touched my mouth. But, on this occasion, I…

  • La piqûre royale

    We have had a right old rigmarole this year with Louis Catorze’s booster vaccination. He was due to have it in September but, because he needed an antibiotic shot after his dental surgery, he couldn’t have the booster in the same appointment, as planned. Then supplies of the vaccine ran out, with replenishments not due…

  • La vie serait tragique si elle n’était pas drôle

    There are two main schools of thought regarding a black cat crossing one’s path: either good luck is on its way, or everything is about to turn to merde. I was of the former but, since various misfortunes befell us during our weekend away, I am less sure. And the fact that it was also…

  • Le chat de la fromagerie

    Cat Daddy took this picture when he was at the Westcombe Cheddar dairy not long ago. Now, for most normal cats, living in a place where they make cheese must be the most wonderful thing on earth. I know that dairy isn’t great for cats but, if your cat is generally healthy, I don’t think…

  • Il est top-model et il est beau

    Puppy Mamma has a craft business selling all manner of delightful things, and she has just gone live on Not On The High Street. If you live in the U.K. (we do) and know any pets who have been good this year (we don’t), I highly recommend her personalised, handmade pet decorations. For reasons that…

  • Le parc à chiens

    I have just had the last of my set of cycling lessons with Cat Daddy’s friend Gerard. (It was supposed to happen ages ago, but then I had appendicitis and somehow I haven’t got around to rearranging it until now.) We usually choose Monday morning as our cycling day, because there are fewer people in…

  • Qu’il mange de la brioche

    Cat Daddy and I are going away later this month, and Blue the Smoke Bengal’s mamma will be on Louis Catorze duty during our absence. We are feeling both relief at the prospect of getting away from his nonsense for a couple of days, and moderate anxiety in case he plays up on her watch.…

  • Le repos de l’âme

    After a month of partying in the run-up to Hallowe’en, my liver is dying. So I am firmly on the wagon until at least the end of the month, longer if I can manage it, and I have resumed the exercise regime that had fallen by the wayside. Louis Catorze – who, incidentally, is still…

  • Un chat noir qui n’y est pas

    It was time to de-flea Louis Catorze the other day and, naturellement, he had disappeared. Cat Daddy: “Have you done the deed yet?” Me: “I don’t know where he is.” Him: “I thought you said he’d gone into the guest room?” [This is his new favourite sleeping spot.] Me: “He did. But he’s not there…

  • Aimer ou ne pas aimer?

    Diwali and Bonfire Night have, once again, been and gone without incident. Louis Catorze was startled by one bang for about 0.6 seconds and then forgot about it, appearing not to even notice that there was any further noise. This is very good news indeed and we are fully aware of how lucky we are.…

  • Le Manoir au Cat

    Cat Daddy and I went to dinner at Le Manoir last week, after he drunk-bid for it in an online charity auction during the first lockdown. As far as drunken purchases go, I’ve seen worse. Usually it would have been no problem leaving Louis Catorze alone for just one night. However, now that he insists…

  • La chance d’être un chat noir

    Hallowe’en is over for another year. Louis Catorze had an absolute blast, and luckily we only had to manage one (1) escape out at The Front, just a minute or two after sunset. The little sod was on top form for his big weekend. In fact, come to think of it, he has been on…