A few updates from us at Le Château:
I am still alive. This is good news, although I still think death would have been kinder because I now have to live out my days knowing I have indirectly had cat arse in my mouth. And our holiday apartment hosts have emailed Cat Daddy to thank him for leaving the place clean and tidy, and have said he is welcome to return anytime. This is also good, if surprising, news.
However, Deliveroo, having pocketed the £100 cost of the order that never came, have still not refunded Cat Daddy and have closed the case because he “failed to respond to their emails”. (He DID respond, multiple times.) This is not quite such good news.
And, in even less optimal news, Louis Catorze has taken his food-driven creepy staring to another level. As well as staring from a distance, staring from close up, and the more passive-aggressive sitting by his bowl looking dejected, he has now begun to creepy-stare whilst we watch television in the dark.
Now, having him stare in the dark may not sound that bad, since a black cat in a dark room is technically invisible. However, this is what we’re faced with:

I know. It’s just not on.
I fear that the little sod may be channelling his big brother Luther, who practically INVENTED food-driven bullying and intimidation. If his pleas for food were ignored and his creepy staring didn’t work, he would take to sliding objects off the table, with his eyes fixed unblinkingly upon mine. If that didn’t work, he would jump up on top of the television and dangle one limb down over the screen, then another limb, then his tail. And if THAT didn’t work, he would pad about on top of the television and find the power button to switch it off.

Because Catorze is considerably less bright than Luther, it has taken him seven years to get to this point. But the fact that he’s got this far is alarming (our expectations were pretty low).
I know that the only solution is not to look at him. But, just like those people who can’t tear their eyes away from a horrible car accident whilst passing, we can’t help it.
He is training you!
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😩😩😩
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Aren’t you afraid of the television falling down? My husband would get crazy if your cat tried to climb up the television.
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We didn’t even think of that. Luther was pretty light and nimble so the thought didn’t even cross our minds!
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No doubt about it… there’s an alien cat in your house! Be careful and don’t watch sci-fi movies…
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It’s too late! He’s here irrespective of whether the TV is on! 👽
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Reminds me of my dog, Tascha, who had an arsenal of techniques to extract food from me. The stare was first, then the paw went up to shake hands. If that didn’t work she would rest her chin on my knee and give me the sad eyes. If all else failed, she would start drooling. That worked every time.
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Oh no, not the sad eyes and the drooling! That’s lethal! 😱😱😱
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Resistance is futile. 🙂
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Did Louis meet Luther? He sounds like a pro
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No, sadly they never met. Luther passed away a month before Sa Maj came to live with us.
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Mouse gate is all I shall say.
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actually, it isn’t. Arse gate has also popped into my head!
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Oh my! I will never forget that. And neither will the husband of one of my friends, who was woken up by her laughing when she read about it.
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So Luther left Catorze a legacy? (You must keep thine servants on their toes at all times; nerves be damned…) 😼
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He did indeed. Catorze also inherited Luther’s sick fund from him. At the time it was around £600 but over the years it has grown, and shrunk, and grown again.
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Catorze owes his big brother a lot 😇💙🐈⬛
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He does. I like to think that, on some level, he knows this and is grateful.
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Oh dear – I have encountered several instances of cats clearlycommunicating across “the veil.” I think Luther has definitely been tutoring him to move s-l-o-w-l-y.
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Oh, I’m certain that he has! As I often say, “I can’t prove it but I know it”.
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Oh my! I hope Darth Vader doesn’t take inspiration from this post.
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I bet he’s planning something already!
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