Cat Daddy’s war against the wildlife is intensifying. Not content with issuing a fatwa on the squirrels, he is now after the birds. Or, to be precise, the large birds.
Apparently, when he set up the bird feeder, he “only wanted small birds to use it”. In fact, its construction doesn’t permit large ones to feed, so I thought he would be satisfied with that. However, the messier of the smaller birds – starlings, I’m looking in your direction – drop bits below when feeding, and it is here that the larger ones take advantage. I don’t feel we should discriminate, especially as we can’t do anything about the extraneous matter that falls on the ground nor the undesirables that gather around it, but Cat Daddy disagrees. And he is cross with Louis Catorze for not doing his bit to deter said undesirables.
Cat Daddy is that grumpy old man that our parents warned us about, who sits by the window with a stick. Sometimes he runs out brandishing his stick, calling the pigeons rude names. And, occasionally, he watches Catorze out there and talks to him the way the Formula One teams talk to their drivers through their Bluetooth headsets, except that Catorze can’t hear him. (And even if he could, he would ignore.)
This is the sort of thing I hear on a daily basis:
Cat Daddy: “Fat bastard pigeon. Come on, Louis, do something! No, not the chaffinch! That’s one of the nice birds! Noooo, don’t go after the nice birds! God, what’s the point in having a f***ing cat?”
Cat Daddy’s most recent addition to the arsenal is this ugly green netting (see picture below), which he claims is to protect the strawberry plants but we all know that it’s to stop the larger birds from picking up scraps that fall beneath the feeder. He has also placed some bamboo canes there, all poking out at various sharp angles for extra menacingness.
This is all going a bit Mad Max. Even Catorze is genuinely fearful of how it will all end.
He could just take down the feeder…..
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No, because he likes the small ones. He doesn’t like the big ones. 🤷♀️
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Cat Daddy needs to plant some multiflora rose under the feeders. Soon the thorns will be so thick that only smaller birds can get into the branches.
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Ooh! That’s a great idea!
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In addition, aren’t there some field mice or worst some rats in the neighborhood? They also like taking advantage of the bits that fall.
😃
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There probably are, yes. 😳
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Hahaha… I just realised I’m not the only one using harsh language concerning pigeons… 😉
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Such an excellent instalment!
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Haha, thank you! It still doesn’t fully communicate the horror of living with homicidal Cat Daddy, though … 😩
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Since this morning, I have wondered about Cat Daddy’s fat bastard pigeons being either wood pigeons or city pigeons.
Des pigeons ramiers ou des pigeons idiots [ according to Renaud ]
Thank you for your answer.
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We get the odd idiot but mainly les ramiers. 🤣🤣🤣
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I totally empathize with Cat Daddy! We don’t have pigeons here but huge magpies who poop all over my balcony and steal the food I want to give to Pumpkin (the resident squirrel) and small birds, too. The magpies take it all, poop everywhere, make a lot of noise, fight together, and scare everyone else! So I had to stop feeding everyone 😦 And Miss Penny, like Sa Maj, is totally useless! *le sigh*
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Oh no! Magpies! We get them, too, and they taunt the heck out of Le Roi, who screams back. Magpies are pretty horrid!
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Oh dear he is loosing it!
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It has been well and truly lost.
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Maybe you could enlist Donnie? As a young Cat, who walks (stalks?) miles (kilometers?) everyday to visit his mentor, he should be in prime physical form to discourage the pigeons.
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He is indeed in prime physical form! However, he is also learning from Le Roi. 😳
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Would it help to tell Cat Daddy that the larger birds eating the seeds will prevent them from turning into weeds among his plants?
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I’ll try, but I imagine not. 🙄
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Le chemin est longue… Surely, there are other cats along the way who serve as professors of pigeon catching.
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Cocoa the babysit cat and his sister Chanel are the king and queen of this. Blue the Smoke Bengal is also a lethal killing machine!
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Just keep an eye on CD’s deliveries as he may up the war to include antipersonnel mines.
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I’m sure he would if he could! 😱
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