louiscatorze.com

Je crie, donc je suis

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Sa Majesté Louis Catorze, Le Roi Soleil, supreme ruler of Le Château, sworn enemy of canine foe and scourge of Ocado delivery drivers.

Month: Nov 2022

  • La vérité la plus folle

    One of our dearest friends visited us at the weekend. He follows Le Blog but, somehow, I never remember this. So, when we meet, I update him on the various twists and turns of Catorzian goings-on, only for him to remind me that he already knows. Cat Daddy: “She does embellish things in the blog,…

  • Traité du zen et de l’entretien des chats

    Louis Catorze went for his booster injections yesterday, and what a drama it was. Obviously he screamed and screamed in the waiting room as usual although, luckily, the only other presence was Poppet the Airedale terrier, who didn’t care and even appeared to wag her tail in time to the screaming. And her Dog Daddy’s…

  • Des chats et des hommes

    It’s the coldest night of the month so far and, naturellement, Louis Catorze has picked now to escape out at The Front. It’s too cold for me to go out looking for him. In fact, it’s too cold even for me to stand at the door for a few minutes and call for him (not…

  • On ne brisera pas les hommes

    I have just returned home after a night away, having left the gentlemen of the household alone for a whole twenty-four hours. Cat Daddy sent me many Catorze photos during my absence, proving that, for all his besmirching of us cat freaks, he is very much one of our number. This one was accompanied by…

  • Heyyy macadamia!

    Cat Daddy and I went to the bulk store the other day to stock up on a few bits. The bulk store is one of my favourite places in the world but it’s very dangerous; it SOUNDS healthy and wholesome but, if you want to buy 934kg of sugary junk, you can. Nobody says anything…

  • Le coussin royal

    What was I saying in my last-but-one post? Something about spending money on a fancy cat bed, only to have the little sod prefer the cardboard box that packaged the bed? What could possibly be more annoying than that? THIS, that’s what: Le Roi has taken the concept one step further by taking something expensive…

  • Chauve derrière et, devant, chevelu

    Louis Catorze went to see the vet yesterday, both for a steroid shot and because his mysterious bald patch has suddenly returned. It’s been six weeks since his last steroid shot, which is very pleasing indeed given that, usually, around autumn, he starts to need them more and more frequently. But the bald patch is…

  • Le thé royal

    You know that old cliché about spending time, effort and money on a fancy cat bed, only to have the little sod prefer the cardboard box that packaged the bed? Over the years Louis Catorze has been lucky enough to receive many fabulous toys from various friends, pilgrims and well-wishers. However, his new favourite thing…

  • En vie et en forme

    I am at that in-between stage of testing negative and being just about well enough to go back to school, yet still feeling run-down and exhausted. And, bizarrely, the most lingering of my Covid symptoms is that I am craving salt in all its forms. Cheese, crisps, salted nuts, even pure grains of salt twisted…

  • Les garçons

    At the weekend I had the displeasure of administering Louis Catorze’s spot-on flea treatment. Because he is such a bastard about it, I have never been able to part his fur and apply it to his skin; I tend to just fling the vial in his general direction and, if any micro-droplets happen to splash…

  • Les spectacles son et lumière

    This time of year is always fireworks a-go-go here in TW8, with Diwali, Hallowe’en and Guy Fawkes* Night in quick succession, although not always in that order since Diwali is moon-dependent. *Non-Brits, if you don’t know about Guy Fawkes, Google him. The government don’t like it when our protests are too loud (whatever “too loud”…

  • L’as de pique

    The Samhain demons have delivered me a belated gift: Covid! Yes, again! As was the case the first time I had Covid, there were signs that this wasn’t just normal winter unwellness: Louis Catorze was all over me for the few days prior to my eventual positive test. Not only did he approach me of…

  • L’Heure du Diable

    Louis Catorze had an absolute cracker of a night on the 31st. Because we had quite the storm raging, he spent much of his time outside on ICB. But he did pop in occasionally to sit at the top of the stairs and creepy-stare at the trick or treaters. And, when they saw him, they…