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Je crie, donc je suis

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Sa Majesté Louis Catorze, Le Roi Soleil, supreme ruler of Le Château, sworn enemy of canine foe and scourge of Ocado delivery drivers.

Month: Dec 2019

  • Mon cerveau est la clé qui me libère

    We survived Christmas Day with Louis Catorze only escaping out at The Front once. After spending the morning thundering around the house, screaming, he then slept for the rest of the day and gave us some peace. Catorze may well be the expert in supernatural teleportation that defies the laws of science and nature, but…

  • C’tait la veille de Noël

    ‘Twas the night before Noël, and in Le ChâteauA creature was screaming; quite why, we don’t know.No stocking was hung by this cat’s human slaves.(Saint Nick only visits the ones who behave.)The well-behaved pets were all snug in their beds,While visions of summertime danced in their heads;Cat Daddy with red wine and I, with my…

  • La renaissance du soleil

    Louis Catorze’s Cat Granny passed away last month, and Cat Daddy and I have been thinking about her during our traditional winter solstice reminiscing. She was the best mother-in-law imaginable and would always take my side in an argument with Cat Daddy. In fact, she would always take my side even if there had been…

  • Le calendrier de l’avent

    I am usually quite a stickler for tradition when it comes to advent calendars: I don’t like chocolate, Santa, North Pole animals wearing clothes, excess glitter, mini bottles of alcohol (just give me one large bottle) and DEFINITELY not Disney characters (shudder). I like plain, normal windows with no weird gimmicks and genuine midwinter symbols…

  • Le bruit ne fait pas de bien, et le bien ne fait pas de bruit

    Someone escaped out at The Front when we went to the cheese shop the other day, and this is what greeted us when we got home (see below). You can even make out Cat Daddy’s “Shut up!” 3 seconds in. This must be what our neighbours hear and see every single time the little sod…

  • Les lumières de Noël

    What a surprise when I returned from work the other day to discover that Cat Daddy had set up a magical winter wonderland here at Le Château. This was especially cheering after our trip to Paris last weekend (yes, the same trip that was postponed in the summer when I injured myself trying to de-flea…

  • Le sapin de mort

    We have the maman of all middle-class problems here at Le Château: the festive tree that we purchased for our cat is so spiky that we can’t decorate it. Cat Daddy: “Well, you wanted a tree for him. It’s your fault.” To be fair, he has a point. Here is a picture of the tree…

  • Suivez le chemin de briques bleues

    One of the joys of WordPress is that I can draft posts and save them for later and, for some time now, I have had an entry sitting in my Drafts folder, waiting for the right photograph to accompany it. The post is about our new front path and how much nicer Louis Catorze looks…

  • Trop de choses à faire

    The winter solstice is fast approaching and, whilst Louis Catorze is following his natural instincts and burying himself so deeply into his igloo that I fear he might become part of it, Cat Daddy and I are doing the opposite. We have so much to do, including the following: ⁃ Buying, putting up and decorating…