Have you ever unintentionally broken the law?
Well, let’s see:
1. Trespassing: wandering onto other people’s land without permission.
2. Breaking and entering: wandering into other people’s property without permission.
3. Affray: loud disputes with at least one bird, squirrel, dog or other cat.
4. Violent disorder: as above, but with numerous third parties at once.
5. Threatening behaviour: causing alarm and/or distress with any or all of the above.
I am talking about Louis Catorze, of course, not me. Although it would be funny as hell to see a human having a loud, public spat with a cat.
The word “unintentionally” bothers me somewhat, as Catorze wouldn’t do these things by mistake. That said, “intentionally” suggests that he actually cares.
He doesn’t.
It would be more accurate to say that he commits the above offences with neither intent nor lack of intent but, rather, with a cold indifference and a blatant disregard for whether he breaks the law or not.
It’s not often that I catch him in the act – which is good, as it lends more weight to my “It must have been some other black cat” argument, should anyone else witness anything – but here is one occasion when I did. Yes, it really was loud enough for me to actually get out of bed and come downstairs to investigate.
There are many, many more, but I’ll stop at that.

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