Have you ever had surgery? What for?
It seems I’m trying to attain the world record for the greatest number of surgeries undertaken by a human being. I have had the following, so far, in this order, with the last one only last week:
⁃ An osteotomy
⁃ A disc fusion
⁃ A myomectomy
⁃ Erm, a shoulder thing (can’t remember the medical name for it)
⁃ An emergency appendectomy
⁃ A hysteroscopy, a transcervical resection of fibroid and an endometrial biopsy (all three together)
Perhaps Louis Catorze has inherited his sickly constitution from me? That said, given that he’s had so many medical treatments himself, it’s strange that he should have zero empathy for people who are sick or convalescing. If I sneeze, and he happens to be on my lap, he scowls contemptuously and runs off, doing the bird-chatter noise as he goes. And he seems to save up his worst behaviour for when I’m recovering from something, as this and this will demonstrate.
Anyway, the most recent three-in-one extravaganza was, in actual fact, quite short and straightforward, so I was home the same morning. Surprisingly, Catorze could not have been more affectionate. And his fur was super-soft, the way it always is when he’s been in the care of a chat-sitteur before turning to merde again when we resume duties, so it was wonderfully therapeutic for me to be able to relax on the sofa, stroking and cuddling him.
All good, non?
Well … NON.
Since I didn’t have my wits fully about me as I recovered from the general anaesthetic, I forgot that Catorze is just like a toddler: a too-long sleep and insufficient tiring-out during the day mean torment after dark.
After sleeping on my lap all day, he went absolutely berserk that night. And the fact that there was a storm outside not only unlocked an extra level of psycho in him, but also meant that he was constantly rolling his cold, wet body onto us, then going back out to re-wet so that he could do it again. And again. AND AGAIN.
The next morning, he was perfectly dry and back to being sweet again. As long as I live, I shall never understand this animal.
Are you one of the chosen ones whose cats are nice to you when you’re ill? Please comment with some uplifting stories which will restore my faith in catkind.
louiscatorze.com 
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