L’alpha et l’oméga (Plan B Partie 1)

We have starting using Louis Catorze’s beauty oil 2,0 – called Coatex – and it seems to smell very slightly less pungent than the Nutramega, so hopefully this means it will make him smell less pungent, too.

This time the oil inside the capsules is a runny liquid, so I have to be very careful blobbing it onto his body. And Catorze is even less aware of when I’ve blobbed it onto him, so he pads around in confused circles wondering where the smell is coming from. And woe betide me if I apply it just as he’s about to eat, because the dozy muppet thinks it’s his Orijen that somehow smells different and then he doesn’t eat.

Anyway, this is typically how the daily applications go:

1. Pierce capsule with cocktail stick.

2. Sit and wait for Catorze to come and sit on my lap.

3. Catorze decides to go out and fight Donnie / goad foxes / hunt rats instead of spending time with me.

4. Sit for 973 hours next to holey, fishy capsule, waiting for little sod to come back.

5. Catorze returns from his gallivanting and settles on my lap. Take opportunity to grab the capsule, squeeze it and blob oil onto his leg, but forget which end has hole and end up smearing most of it on myself. (The Nutramega very conveniently caved in at the holey end so it was easy to tell, but this one doesn’t.)

6. Clumsily attempt to smear oil from self onto Catorze’s leg. He is not a fan of this.

7. Catorze fails to acknowledge that he has fishy oil on his leg. Am therefore stuck with a fishy, oily cat on my lap.

8. Catorze starts to sniff the air but doesn’t appear to know that the smell is coming from his leg.

9. Catorze grooms every part of his body apart from the fishy, oily leg.

10. Catorze looks at me as if I am the one who smells, most likely because I now do.

Quel cauchemar. And I only have to do this, erm, every single day for the rest of his life.

Wondering what the hell the smell is.

16 thoughts on “L’alpha et l’oméga (Plan B Partie 1)

  1. He does look quite reproachful. It;s almost as if he absolutely does understand exactly what is going on and is determined not to cooperate. To put it in the vernacular : Dumb animal my ass !

    Liked by 2 people

    1. He probably knows more than he lets on. His creepy kitty sixth sense is probably working hard to let him know when this is coming!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You are right. For some reason, a vet had prescribed our previous cat some baths and the latter knew she was about to have a bath thanks to my kind of waterproof apron.

        Liked by 1 person

            1. Oh gosh! I really don’t envy you having to do that. Were you able to manage poor kitty’s skin problem?


  2. The poor one was allergic to flea bites. She used to scratch so enthusiastically that she dug craters in her skin. The baths were meant to soothe the itching.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh no! I can see why you had to give baths, although how awful for all concerned that it became necessary.


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