When Louis Catorze stopped eating his fish oil vol-au-vents, I tried smearing the oil onto his fur to see if he would groom it off. When it worked a treat, I decided to adopt this method permanently, using a teaspoon as an applicator as my finger was too melty and my lip balm pot was just too weird.

My morning routine now includes squeezing the contents* of a capsule onto the back of a teaspoon, taking said teaspoon into the living room with me with my morning cup of tea and waiting for the little sod to join me. When he does, I pounce.

*I do the whole lot every other day rather than half every day, which saves me from having to reserve a sticky, smelly, half-squeezed capsule. I choose the odd-numbered days because Le Roi is odd.

Now, Catorze wouldn’t be Catorze if he didn’t do something strange and off-the-wall in response to this. The first time I did it he was fine but the second time, unbelievably, he didn’t know where the smell was coming from. His sense of smell is supposed to be 972 times better than mine, and yet I could detect this foul substance from across the room but he had no idea it was ON HIS OWN ARM.

Catorze sniffed the coffee table, the window shutters and the lamp.

Me: “It’s on you!”

Catorze sniffed the carpet, the sofa and his igloo.

Me: “C’EST SUR TOI!”

It was quite some time before the penny dropped and he finally started to groom himself. Naturellement by this point he had done a few circuits of the whole room trying to find the source of the smell, with me nervously following him with kitchen towel and anti-bacterial spray (which I suspect are powerless against oil but I didn’t know what else to do) and desperately praying for him not to rub against anything porous.

The same company who makes the Omega 3 also makes a brain supplement. I don’t suppose we’ll be needing that.

Thanks but no thanks.
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21 responses to “L’alpha et l’oméga (Partie 3)”

  1. Lou Carreras avatar

    a smarter Xenia? Oh no. We’ll pass

    Liked by 1 person

    1. iamthesunking avatar
      iamthesunking

      Hahaha! Could be dangerous!

      Like

    2. Emma avatar

      I’m starting to think polydactyls are the next evolution of kitties — opposable thumbs!! O_O So yeah, they’re smart enough already, thanks. xD

      Liked by 2 people

      1. iamthesunking avatar
        iamthesunking

        Oh my! It’s the beginning of their Grand Plan to take over the world, isn’t it?

        Liked by 2 people

        1. Emma avatar

          Beginning? More like Part… what’s 102 in French?

          Liked by 2 people

          1. iamthesunking avatar
            iamthesunking

            Hahaha! Cent deux!

            Liked by 1 person

            1. Emma avatar

              Aha! I remembered deux, but I’ve also heard that French is weird about numbers (and vowels. And naming apples?) I took Spanish in school, though, and can only remember bits and pieces (usually when I’m trying to remember something non-Spanish-related). xD

              But yeah, I think Step Un (?) was domesticating humans. You know, when they moved in and were all, “hey, you gonna eat that rat?” and “hey, you gonna sleep in front of that fire?” and “hey, look after my kittens while I hunt”. Step Deux was convincing us we domesticated them. Step cent deus = profit???

              Liked by 2 people

            2. iamthesunking avatar
              iamthesunking

              Don’t forget Step (whatever number) = get chipped so that they can maximise communication and synchronise troublemaking! Better yet: get the humans to do it, and let them think it’s some safety measure! 🤣🤣🤣

              Liked by 2 people

            3. Emma avatar
    1. iamthesunking avatar
      iamthesunking

      🤣🤣🤣

      Like

  2. mmechapeau avatar
    mmechapeau

    Your life with Louis is far from being a long calm river. Please, don’t misunderstand me, but as I live in Belgium, I’m wondering whether all Brit cats are as pampered as Louis.
    😺

    Liked by 3 people

    1. iamthesunking avatar
      iamthesunking

      I’m sure many of them are even worse! 🤣🤣🤣

      Liked by 1 person

    2. Emma avatar

      Ummmm. -shifty eyes-

      Liked by 1 person

      1. iamthesunking avatar
        iamthesunking

        🤣🤣🤣

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Dr. CaSo avatar

    lol does Sa Maj respond to French better than English?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. iamthesunking avatar
      iamthesunking

      Nah. He ignores me in both languages. 🙄

      Liked by 2 people

  4. catladymac avatar
    catladymac

    It is a fact that after awhile you become inured to certain smells (I should know as I worked in a pickle packing plant a couple of summers…) and don’t notice them (or at least are no longer bothered by them).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. iamthesunking avatar
      iamthesunking

      Fishy oil. 🤢🤢🤢🐈‍⬛

      Like

  5. cat9984 avatar

    Maybe he’s just messing with you

    Liked by 1 person

    1. iamthesunking avatar
      iamthesunking

      No, he would never do such a WAIT A MINUTE.

      Liked by 1 person

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