Cat Daddy: “What were you ordering from Amazon at 7:30 this morning?”
MERDE. I keep forgetting that the order notifications go through to his phone and not mine.
Me: “Erm …”
Me: “Erm … ahem … Hallowe’en costumes for [Puppy Mamma]’s dogs.”
Him: “[Unrepeatable expletives]”
Him: “Does she know that you’re buying them?”
Me: “Yes. She was going to buy some anyway.”
Him: “So why couldn’t you just let her be stupid on her own? Why did you have to be stupid as well?”
[Silence, tumbleweed, crickets]
Anyway, when he saw the photos he laughed. And, as we all know, once laughter takes place it automatically invalidates the right to criticise.
Here are the Nala the dog and Gizzy the [insert name of species] trying out their costumes. Louis Catorze, of course, is smug in the knowledge that he doesn’t need a costume because he’s scary enough as he is.