Louis Catorze doesn’t like it when people sneeze. His reaction is more annoyance than fear: he emits an audible scowl, then runs away making bird-chatter sounds. Yes, we know that this is weird.
Cat Daddy’s sneezes are so ear-bleeding loud that they make his guitar sing (or maybe gently weep, I don’t know). This is no joke. Even when the guitar is hanging on the wall, in the immediate aftermath of one of his sonic boom sneezes we can briefly hear the metallic hum of the strings.
One night, as is typical of most nights, I went to bed early, and Catorze accompanied me and settled on the bed beside me. Downstairs, Cat Daddy sneezed.
Catorze: “Mwah.”
Cat Daddy: [Another sneeze.]
Catorze: “Mwah!”
Cat Daddy: [Another sneeze.]
Catorze: “Mwah-mwah-mwah-mwah-mwah!”
The little sod then proceeded to take off, muttering obscenities under his breath as he went. YES, HE THOUGHT I WAS THE ONE TO OFFEND HIS EARDRUMS WITH THE SNEEZING.
I don’t know what happened after that, nor do I want to, but I imagine he went running to his papa, and the two of them snuggled each other and debated how much better life would be without me.
For more Catorzian capers, please visit http://louiscatorze.com
louiscatorze.com 
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