louiscatorze.com
Je crie, donc je suis
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about
Month: Aug 2021
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I have treated Louis Catorze to a new spring-summer bed, as his chaise longue is now buckled out of shape and no longer fit for use. And, yes, I realise that the timing is silly as summer is coming to an end, but I’ve done it now. Cat Daddy winced as he watched me unwrap…
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Because it’s a bank holiday weekend, my mind drifted to memories of the LAST bank holiday weekend when Cat Daddy gave Disco the dog’s human sister some lessons in musical history and helped her to compile a disco playlist. I don’t know why I didn’t blog about this at the time, but I imagine it…
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Since Brentford FC stormed into the Premier League, I have been furiously knitting away to create some scarves that match our new away kit. Yellow isn’t my favourite colour but, having seen some other clubs’ horror show kits – Spurs and Liverpool, I’m looking in your direction – I think we’ve got off quite lightly.…
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Every neighbourhood has a Ginger Impinger. And there is a new one in town. Defending his royal title, in the Black Corner and weighing in at 3.12kg, is Sa Majesté Louis Catorze, Le Roi Soleil, whom we all know and love. And the challenger, in the Orange Corner and weighing in at 173kg, is this…
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A few days ago I heard Cat Daddy shout “Cat fight!” and, naturellement, I ran to the window see who it was, so that I could tut at the badly-behaved cat(s) and judge the human(s) for their inadequate parenting. I arrived just in time to see Blue the Smoke Bengal being seen off by none…
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Poor old Louis Catorze has been gorging himself silly on Orijen, with no mess whatsoever, since I started sprinkling water over to soften the pieces. On the day of writing this he’d had three breakfasts, and he’s just eating his third dinner of Cat Daddy’s drunkenly-served Orijen soup. He seems to be finding it much…
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Louis Catorze has been making a God-awful mess during feeding. Recently his mat and bowl have been covered in crunched-up fragments of Orijen, suggesting that the pellets are too big for him when, in actual fact, they’re smaller than those of Lily’s Kitchen and therefore should be easier to manage. When I took him for…
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Today is Black Cat Appreciation Day. This celebration was, apparently, created by Wayne Morris, as a memorial for his sister June, a black cat devotee, who passed away on this day. Morris (pictured below) wasn’t actually named after Wayne Morris, but it’s a nice coincidence, n’est-ce pas? Morris works as Head Tester at the Cool…
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I have broken the bowl that Louis Catorze’s friend Sammypuss gave him. I know. I KNOW. Cat Daddy: “What happened to it?” Me: “I dropped it in the sink whilst I was washing it.” Cat Daddy: “Why did you do that?” Well, I dunno … to see if it would bounce? For goodness’ sake. Luckily,…
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Cat Daddy’s Avian Apartheid is working: the larger birds have given up trying to eat from the bird feeder, and he could not be more delighted about this. His favourite visitors are two pairs of pretty goldfinches who come every day, multiple times. During his Friday night Zoom call with his boozy pub mates (yes,…
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Louis Catorze is creeping me out. I am home alone with him right now because Cat Daddy has gone out, and I can hear the sound of the little sod thundering around on our wooden floorboards. I am certain that Le Roi has company but that’s not the worst part of this. After all, I…
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Louis Catorze appears to be on some sort of hunger strike. He’s eaten pitifully little since we returned from holiday, and I imagine it’s either because of the warm weather, or because he’s just an idiot. I’m leaning more towards the latter. Everything else about him is “normal” – in fact, the other day he…
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Cat Daddy and I are home. We are very lucky to be able to go on holiday, but I always look forward to coming home. Louis Catorze, however, disagrees. He greeted us by meowing disdainfully, then wriggled free of my hug and pitter-pattered off into the Zone Libre for several hours. Cat Daddy: “I don’t…
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We are on the last part of our holiday: a few days in the North East, in a lovely townhouse overlooking a little marina. Once again we appear to be on Dog Territory, and I’m not sure that the Sun King would approve of this: Part of our trip included seeing a friend whom I…
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