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Je crie, donc je suis

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Sa Majesté Louis Catorze, Le Roi Soleil, supreme ruler of Le Château, sworn enemy of canine foe and scourge of Ocado delivery drivers.

Month: Apr 2019

  • Une chanson pour fêter l’anniversaire de Sa Majesté Louis Catorze, Le Roi Soleil

    Now this is a story all about how My life got flipped, turned upside-down. And I’d like to take a minute just to let you know. I’ll tell you how I became the Sun King of Le Château. In north-west London was where I was found. In fact, NW10 was my stomping ground.  Chilling out,…

  • Cent coups de brosse avant d’aller dormir

    Today is National Hairball Awareness Day. (I’m deadly serious. Google it if you don’t believe me.) And, ironically, I am writing this after another joyless session of brushing Louis Catorze. Ugh. Bizarrely, he now only fights half-heartedly rather than with the strength of ten angry grizzly bears, yet he still screams like a banshee during…

  • Plus sucré que le sucre

    With the grotesque sugar glutton-fest upon us (Easter, I mean, not The Great British Bake-Off), I thought it apt to mention that the sweetener xylitol is making an appearance in more and more foods. And, whilst it can be good for humans, it’s fatal to animals. Now, dogs aren’t the most discerning diners, as I…

  • Un chat dans Le Château en vaut deux dans la rue

    Non, non, non, Louis Catorze! This is just one of the many reasons* he is not allowed out at The Front unsupervised; rolling around on the dirty pavement that dogs have used as their toilettes is not what we want and, quite frankly, it makes me feel a little sick.  *The other reasons are:  Picking…

  • La coiffure du Roi

    Louis Catorze is in full-on moult mode which, of course, means we have to brush him at least once a day, more if possible. And you know how vile he is when being brushed.  The screaming is pretty awful but I am now used to it. What’s more daunting is the sheer never-endingness of the…

  • Notre petite vie est cernée de sommeil

    Louis Catorze disappeared without a trace at the weekend. After hunting all over the house, including in locked cupboards, we eventually found him in the guest bedroom, buried deep underneath the duvet and utterly out of sight except for the tip of his silly little tail sticking out. So, now that the weather has turned…

  • Le printemps, c’est l’époque des projets et des plans

    The dark winter seems a lifetime away now, and, somehow, the longer days give us the feeling that we have so much more time to do things. That’s what it all means to us, at least. To Louis Catorze, it means burrowing deeply into his igloo and never coming out. Cat Daddy: “This isn’t normal.…