Category: Uncategorized
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A couple of nights ago, Cat Daddy and I settled down on the sofa to watch the latest series of Unforgotten on Netflix. Usually, when we watch television in the evenings, Louis Catorze is on his papa’s lap. But, this time, we didn’t know where he was. Cat Daddy, a few minutes into the first…
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The only thing more embarrassing than having a black cat with bright white ears, is other people knowing that you have a black cat with bright white ears. So, naturellement, the last time that I applied Louis Catorze’s ear sunblock, he escaped out at The Front when I put some recycling out. I didn’t even…
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A couple of nights ago, Cat Daddy and I sat down to watch the live election debate between our current Prime Minister and the Leader of the Opposition. Louis Catorze joined us, taking his usual place on his papa’s lap. Fifteen minutes in and I’d had enough; all they did was shout over each other…
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Describe your dream chocolate bar Cats and chocolate don’t really go together, so Louis Catorze doesn’t have a dream one. However, if he WERE a chocolate bar, he would be one of those 99% ones: dark, bitter and only manageable in very small doses. For more Catorzian capers, please visit http://louiscatorze.com
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Although the idea of being awoken by sweet birdsong is romantic, the reality is somewhat different. In the summer months, London’s resident parakeets – yes, we really do have them living wild here – start their infernal racket at 4am. Although they’re strikingly pretty birds, there’s nothing nice about the noise that they make (nor…
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Earlier this week, the beautician came over for a waxing and massage appointment. Louis Catorze has had some lively interactions with her in the past and, now that he is used to her, that’s where I thought any nonsense would remain: IN THE PAST. Catorze, however, had other ideas. He was conspicuously absent during the…
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What better way to spend a half term break than accidentally meeting celebrity cats? Cat Daddy and I met up with some friends, who also happen to be fellow Chat Noir hostages, and, after lunch, we went for a short walk along the river as it was a lovely day. And we just happened to…
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What are you good at? Not applying cat sunblock, that’s for sure. This is the face – or, rather, the rear end – of someone who has just fought like an absolute demon to try and prevent me from applying his sunblock on his ears: My friend, who is a dog person: “Does he NEED…
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When I opened the door the other night to put out some recycling, Louis Catorze slalomed between my ankles and shot out. I know: standard Catorze. However, I had forgotten that it was a full moon that night. So, when Cat Daddy and I, on separate occasions, tried to corral him back in, there was…
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Louis Catorze’s ears are starting to go bald again. This happened a few years ago, for no reason whatsoever, and the vet was unable to provide any answers. Then the fur grew back again, so we didn’t bother pursuing it any further (not that we would have known what to do, had we wished to…
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Cat Daddy is away in New York at the moment, so it’s just me and Louis Catorze at Le Château. Usually, when Cat Daddy is out, Catorze ramps up the bad behaviour, only to morph back into a placid, impeccably-behaved kitty when his papa returns. Predictably, he is doing exactly that now, except this time…
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I have managed to record Louis Catorze drinking from the tall tumbler version of the Versailles wine glass. (Yes, I bought him TWO birthday glasses, so that he would have one if the other were in the wash.) The angle is weird and it’s not the clearest footage because I had to film it from…
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List your top 5 favourite fruits. Will one fruit do? We had a visitor to Le Château the other day, as you can see below. And, before you ask what on earth this has to do with fruit, our guest’s name is Lemon. I’m not joking. Lemon may look like a fine specimen of velvety…
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What’s one small improvement you can make in your life? Louis Catorze thinks his life is perfectly delightful as it is, merci for asking. He thinks it’s the rest of us who need to improve OUR pathetic lives, and that we should do so as follows: 1. Give the cat whatever they want. 2. See…
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