louiscatorze.com

Je crie, donc je suis

Author: iamthesunking

  • I’m starting to wonder whether we should just give black cats one Cône to share between them because, as soon as one of them stops needing it, a different one does something stupid. If it’s not one, it’s another. Bastards, the lot of them.  Cat Daddy and I went away on Friday, to different places,…

  • What does freedom mean to you? Maybe Rodan would like to answer this? Or Louis Catorze? Or any cat who has had to spend time in Le dreaded Cône? After healing up nicely since sustaining injuries from a fight, Rodan was released from Le Cône. However, immediately upon release, the silly sod scratched himself up…

  • With which public figure do you disagree the most? Much as it pains me to claim that I know better than an eminent scientist, I don’t share Stephen Hawking’s view that Artificial Intelligence could pose a threat to us. Not long ago, when we were watching television, Louis Catorze stepped on the smart remote’s microphone…

  • What was the last live performance you saw? It’s funny you should ask, WordPress, because it took place just last night. And what a performance it was.  In the same way that nature abhors a vacuum, Louis Catorze cannot abide a closed door. Cat Daddy had an online meeting yesterday evening, with a local business…

  • My Catorzian thyroid-medicating skills have improved. And by “improved” I mean I’m about 0.03% less shit than I was when I did the first one.  Applying ear gel to a cat who doesn’t want ear gel is no mean feat, nor is it the kind of thing you can just do when the moment takes…

  • It’s Bank Holiday Monday, and we are still basking in the afterglow of Louis Catorze’s Quinceañera (which Cat Daddy keeps pronouncing as “quince-a-rama”, like Bananarama but with, erm, a quince instead of a banana).  The final guest list was as follows: *That Neighbour is so called because he is always the one who ends up…

  • Thank you so much to everyone who sent birthday wishes to Louis Catorze, and special thanks to whoever sent him this, which he loved: The little sod had a splendid time out all night, then waking me up at 5am, just for fun. His Quinceañera will take place tomorrow, and I will update you next…

  • Do you have a quote by which you live your life, or of which you often think? (Sorry, WordPress, but the original wording bothered me.)  Being pagans at heart, Cat Daddy and I rather like the Wiccan saying, “If you do no harm, do what you will”.  Louis Catorze lives his life by the second…

  • Louis Catorze is fifteen today, putting him in the unglamorous yet hilarious “Geriatric” category: I was a little sad when I read that treating his hyperthyroidism would buy him another three to five years, because that really didn’t sound like much time. Then I remembered that he’s fifteen now so, in actual fact, that gives…

  • When considering treatments for Louis Catorze’s hyperthyroidism, we were offered the options of a pill, an oral liquid or a topical gel. I went for the gel on the grounds that at least Catorze wouldn’t be able spit it back at me, nor would he find inventive ways of pretending he’s ingested it when he…

  • If you’ve ever had to change the food of a fussy cat, don’t follow the usual advice, which is to phase it in gradually. If it’s mixed with something that they already like, of COURSE they’ll eat it, in the same way that I’d probably eat razor blades and asbestos if they were covered in…

  • After joking about hornets’ nests in a previous blog post, I am astounded to report that we may actually have one.  Wasps keep randomly appearing in the house, usually in the same room and without any window having been open. I trapped a few and released them, thinking they were my friend’s friendly, do-gooder honey…

  • Normally, at this point in the year, I would be ordering one portion of jambon de Bayonne from Ocado for Louis Catorze’s birthday, another from the Natoora deli in Chiswick as a back-up, and some jamón ibérico from Waitrose, just in case. However, because the little sod has just been diagnosed with hyperthyroidism, it’s a…

  • We have a Code Bleu situation here. Well, not HERE, but in CR4, the manor of Boots, usurper stepbrother of Antoine, Louis Catorze’s frère-from-another-mère.  Remember Boots and his penchant for losing his Chelsea collars? Well, he is now down to his last one, but we can’t buy him any more because the Chelsea Megastore is…