What advice would you give to your teenage self?
Since Louis Catorze is a teenager right now (in human years, anyway), his advice to himself remains current, and is: “Keep them guessing.” The little sod adheres rigidly to this motto, every single day; Cat Daddy and I are perpetually left wondering what the hell.
(That last sentence is complete, by the way. Not “… what the hell something something”. Just “… what the hell”.)
After eating his evening meal – well, one of his many evening meals, since the greedy guzzler just can’t seem to stop scoffing lately – Catorze went into the dining room to gad about. This is quite normal, and we are used to hearing paper rustling and things being knocked around as he parkours. However, on this occasion, the little sod emerged WET.
There is absolutely no accessible liquid in that room, apart from my massive jars of kombucha which are far too heavy for a 2.83kg cat to upend. Those jars are still intact and exactly as I left them, and everything else is in sealed bottles. So where did the liquid come from? And – shudder – WHAT IF IT’S NOT WATER?
Cat Daddy’s theory is that perhaps Catorze “purred all over himself”. He has a tendency to dribble whilst purring – Catorze, I mean, not Cat Daddy – and the idea of him having so much fun trashing the dining room that he purred throughout, whilst completely absurd, is not entirely impossible.
I still haven’t been brave enough to investigate the nature and location of the spillage/leakage. That said, it wouldn’t surprise me not to find a single trace, leaving me forever wondering exactly what happened in that room to my silly cat who is old enough to know better.
For more Catorzian capers, please visit http://louiscatorze.com
louiscatorze.com 
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