The citizens of the United Kingdom have spent the last couple of days taking in the government’s new pandemic advice. Which is as follows: “Go back to work. NOT ON THE TUBE, FOR GOD’S SAKE.”
Meanwhile, Louis Catorze has almost finished his course of steroids. And what a très grand relief this is because, as you know, they have turned him into a fireball of energy and a criminal genius, and we just can’t keep up with him.
Just like Bradley Cooper in that film about the blue pills, it’s as if the steroids allow Catorze to access the parts of his brain that he wasn’t accessing before (and, lets face it, that’s a lot of previously-untouched brain). He has become uncharacteristically cunning and resourceful and, avec Cône, managed to do a number of things that Côned cats should not be able to do, including – but not limited to – the following:
1. Scaling 2-metre fences.
2. Travelling across several gardens, covering more ground than we ever thought possible.
3. Opening doors.
4. Chasing foxes.
5. Losing the detachable part of Le Cône.
6. Losing Le whole Cône.
7. Discovering bizarre new ways of scratching himself, the most notable of which was by using the corners of Cat Daddy’s old vinyl album covers. (Please see below for a picture of Le Roi having just toppled Deep Purple’s Machine Head after being caught in the act.)
Catorze will have been on the pills, in various strengths, for almost twelve weeks in total. Had it been a few weeks longer, we probably could have asked him to join our pub quiz team and he would have nailed that tricky anagrams round. And, after a few months, he may well have become Prime Minister.
Me: “Who would you rather have as Prime Minister? Option 1: Boris Johnson. Option 2 …”
Cat Daddy, interrupting: “OPTION 2.”
So that’s settled, then.
jesuisleroisoleil 
Congratulations Sa Maj! Perhaps he’s trying to explain that his brain is a finely tuned machine, the capabilities of which are beyond human understanding… C’est dur être un génie! 😹
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We’d have to locate that brain first, to find out how finely tuned it is … 🤣
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Very glad to read Le Roi is doing better, for his sake and for yours … !
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He is on top form at the moment, full of annoying energy.
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Deep Purple – the boy has good taste!!!
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He used the album as an itching apparatus! Cat Daddy thinks this was the height of disrespect. 🤣
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Id vote for Sa Maj any day, come to mention it , any cat or crawling thing would be better than the buffoon we have now!🐈🐈🐛🐛🐛🐛
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Are you in the U.K., Cathy? Just trying to clarify which buffoon you mean!
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Prime Minister ? There are openings in high places in The Former Colonies too ! Meantime, get him on the Pub Quiz team now that the UK is reopened.
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He took part in our virtual pub quiz last week! No joke!
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Please let us know how that went !
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Cat Daddy just held him in front of the screen and danced with him at the end! His actual contribution was, erm, minimal.
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Louis would make a wonderful PM. He does nnot appear to suffer fools gladly. And your current PM doesn’t seem to be using all of his brain either. (A trick I’m sure he learned from our President but not quite mastered that level of inanity)
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I actually think your leader and ours are the same person, and that any footage of them “together” has actually been doctored.
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Ooh. I like that idea.
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