If you started a sports team, what would the colours and mascot be?
Louis Catorze already supports a football team – Sunderland – whose nickname is The Black Cats and whose mascots are, erm, black cats. You can’t get much better than that. However, their online shop sells dog collars but not cat ones, which is either a massive oversight or a sign that cats won’t be bossed by anyone:
Sunderland traditionally play in red and white, but Catorze doesn’t care about colours; he’s just grateful that football compels spectating men to sit down and watch television, because this guarantees him some comfortable male laps for at least ninety minutes.
However, if he were to start a football team consisting of just cats, he would have Olly the British Blue as his number one keeper and Boots, usurper stepbrother of his frère-from-another-mère, Antoine, as his first choice centre-half. Have a look here to see how Olly’s Cat Daddy – also a goalkeeper – trained him.
As for Boots, his solid stature and zero-tolerance approach to impingers would make him an ideal blocker, although he’s a versatile player and can attack as well as defend.
Managers aren’t allowed on the pitch during matches, but Catorze, who practically INVENTED doing the opposite of what people expect or want, wouldn’t be able to help himself. And we imagine he would look just like this cat, whose flatlining ears indicate that he wasn’t too impressed with this particular performance:
Is your cat a potential sportsperson? If so, what would they do/play?
louiscatorze.com 
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