louiscatorze.com
Je crie, donc je suis
Tag: cats
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If you had a motorway hoarding, what would it say? HAVE YOU SEEN THIS CAT? If you see him, walk away. Run, if you have to.
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What could you do less of? (This is terrible English but I’m just going to go with it.) The good thing about being a king is that, if you don’t want to do something, you can always ask one of your underlings to do it for you. These days, it’s far too cold to be…
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Do you ever see wild animals? Just when I thought that Louis Catorze had exhausted every possible way to scare the merde out of me, the little sod manages to find more. My phone charger, which sits on my bedside table at night, is one of those ones that looks like a flat disc, with…
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The first thing that I did upon finding out that Louis Catorze had chipped one of his fangs, was spend ages looking through photos to try to ascertain when it could have happened. However, his fangs can look absolutely massive, utterly invisible and everything in between, depending on the light and the angle, so it’s…
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It’s been two months since Louis Catorze’s last steroid shot. He’s only allowed a maximum of one per month, and there have been times when I’ve anxiously checked my calendar, desperate to take him for the next one, to find that it’s only been three weeks and we somehow have to hang on for a…
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My last blog post received quite the rapturous reception from my followers. As a tribute to the vigilante cats, I asked Bing’s AI bot to create a picture of them, along with their comrade Hunter, Scourge of Rottweilers (centre). I hope that they are strutting around kitty heaven looking just like this: In other news,…
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Hallowe’en came and went, and Louis Catorze delivered us the biggest scare imaginable: he behaved. I know. Take all the time you need to absorb that information. Our first trick-or-treaters came knocking not long after 5pm. Many of them commented on our “Beware of the black cat” pumpkin, at which point Cat Daddy would approach…
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The wait is over and the big night is here. No, not Botanical Week on the Great British Bake-Off (although I am curious, since nobody understands what it means). I mean Hallowe’en, of course. We are a little nervous as we don’t know how we will contain Louis Catorze, given that we will be opening…
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What is your favourite form of physical exercise? I love walking. However, TW8 is a very doggy neighbourhood, and dog people love walking, too. It’s not the dogs that are the problem but, rather, what I might step into whilst walking. I remain traumatised by that time I saw Cat Daddy step on one dog…
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Do lazy days make you feel rested or unproductive? Yes and yes. Et alors?
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What is your favorite hobby or pastime? I love watching horror films. I have just watched one called Crawl, which is all about a girl and her dad who end up trapped in the crocodile-infested, rapidly-flooding crawl space under their house during a storm. It’s pretty silly – the girl is a competitive swimmer (believable)…
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So … cats and séances. You probably won’t like the idea of your sweet little kitty communing with evil spirits, but they’re all at it. It’s not just the black vampire cats, although blackness and vampirism do somewhat increase the chances of evil doings. (Don’t ask me how I know this.) If cats are in…
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What skill would you like to learn? I have recently joined a Smart phone photography social media group. People post their original shots versus the edited versions, and everyone compares the two and tells them whether they’ve gone a bit overboard or got the balance right. People mainly post landscapes and human portraits in the…
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A couple of nights ago, when I was sitting in the living room with Louis Catorze on my lap, Cat Daddy walked into the room and said, “There’s a huge full moon outside.” Not even a second after those words had left him, Catorze jumped off my lap, ran to the window and headbutted the…
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