2018 vous dit adieu

If cats could make New Year resolutions, they wouldn’t. 

Resolutions are what we humans do to better ourselves, but cats think that they’re great as they are and that it’s the rest of the world who should change its pathetic, inadequate behaviour. We also make resolutions to improve our everyday lives and to make them easier and, again, cats don’t have to concern themselves with all that. That’s why they have us. 

Bonne Année to you all, and thank you for your support this year.

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Il y a beaucoup à apprendre des bêtes

Finalement, 2 months after Halloween, Louis Catorze manages to deliver an almost-passable Halloween portrait. This picture isn’t ideal in terms of composition but it’s the best effort to date, and, on paper, at least, it captures the essence of my favourite day of the year: a black cat, a fine set of fangs and even a photobomb from The Count himself.

I didn’t set it up that way: Count Dracula would usually be on a Yule tree – that’s the way we do things here at Le Château – but he is hanging on a door handle this year, on account of being neither waterproof enough for the outdoor tree nor small enough for Louis Catorze’s mini-tree. It was just a coincidence that he happened to be lurking in the background during one of Catorze’s psycho play sessions, but a good coincidence nonetheless.

It would have been nice to have had this picture back in October, instead of having 748+ shots of his arse end walking away from a pumpkin. But that’s Le Roi for you: Sun King, Lord of Misrule, High Emperor of Doing Inappropriate Things at Inappropriate Times (I haven’t forgotten about the 3am popping of bubble wrap) and the epitome of all that is wrong with the world.

And on that perfect note I shall wish you all a joyous and prosperous 2018. Thank you for your ongoing support of the little sod.

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Le nouvel an

As we say goodbye to a year that has been pretty merdique, and welcome a new year which, surely, cannot be any worse, all of us at Le Château would like to thank you sincerely for your ongoing support of Louis Catorze.

When I started Le Blog I never imagined we would reach in excess of 140 followers – I expected maybe 20 of my friends to follow, with around half of these deciding “Enough of this shit” and unfollowing after a fortnight or two – so to know that you are all still with us is wonderful.

Special thanks to those of you who have kindly sent gifts to Sa Majesté or come to visit him. We hope to see many more of you next year, although he gets booked up early so don’t leave it too long. He already has 3 visitors arranged for January!

Bonne année from us, and may 2017 be a joyous and happy year for you.

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Flotte comme un papillon, pique comme une abeille

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Louis Catorze is strutting around Le Château as if he were the heavyweight champion of the world.

Mind you, by “world”, we really mean a small patch of land in TW8 measuring about 10 metres by 6 metres. And weighing in at 3.48kg (as he did at his Christmas Eve vet visit) is hardly, by any reasonable interpretation of the word, “heavyweight”. Come to think of it, given that we haven’t seen the condition of his opponent and can’t conclusively state that Catorze delivered the knockout punch, even “champion” is a bit of a stretch.

Apart from all that, though, he’s the feline incarnation of Muhammad Ali, sans doute.

He is utterly unconcerned about the fight and is full of feisty confidence. (I like to think this is because he’s such a fearless warrior, but in reality he’s probably just forgotten about it.) People who haven’t seen him for a while – even Cat Daddy, who was away for a day or two – remark upon how thick and soft his fur is, and how meaty and well he looks. His ear, on the other hand, looks rather like a gnarled, 900-year-old tree root, and I expect it will continue to look this way as it heals, but it’s much less red and sore than it was. Plus it adds a little grit and character to his neatness, rather like a tattoo, a piercing or an extreme sports injury (not that Louis Catorze has any friends to impress).

As this year comes to a close and we prepare to welcome in the new one, this is a great place to be. All of us at Le Château wish you a very Happy New Year, and we hope that 2016 brings joy to you and your furry overlords. Xxx