Une mouche noire dans mon Chardonnay

Some things are so predictable that not only should we see them coming, but we don’t really deserve much sympathy if we don’t. One of those is Louis Catorze doing the ONE THING that we don’t want him to do. And, yet again, he has delivered.

The little sod has managed to slalom his royal rump between Cat Daddy’s barricades and is sitting in the tarragon trough again. Yes, I know you told me so. And, yes, I know I was stupid for thinking it would go any other way than this.

Bastard cat.
Insouciant royal rump.

Cat Daddy, as you can imagine, is enraged beyond belief. He has now jabbed even more shanks into the trough, at various forbidding criss-cross angles, in an effort to discourage Catorze, and only time will tell whether or not this will work. We have to hope that it will. Otherwise, what next? Poison-tipped razor wire? Motion-activated toxic gas sprinklers? Garlic and a crucifix?

I often talk about ear plugs to block out Catorze’s screaming. However, right now, it’s the Unrepeatable Expletives that are battering my eardrums. Between them, the males of this household are doing me in.

34 thoughts on “Une mouche noire dans mon Chardonnay

  1. Oh bless you, you can’t win and remember the saying ‘if you can’t beat them, join them!’?? You need to invent a tribal warning squeal that incorporates Cat Daddy’s enraged swear voice and Louis Catorze’s scream!! You never know, they may be so shocked that they stop making their noises!!

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  2. Perhaps you could have a decoy herb bed, for Catorze, while the others get ignored and thrive? Or does the little bugger shift from one bed to the next, to be sure he gets them all? Maybe a motion-activated water sprinkler will do it! They make them to deter deer from the garden, after all.

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  3. According to me, instead of being angry, you should be proud of your little boy who achieved to bypass Cat Daddy’s barricades.
    😺

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      1. According to me, to prevent Louis from sitting in the tarragon, you’d better put the latter in an unattainable spot e.g. a bed you can reach only when climbing a ladder…
        Of course, I don’t have to tell you that the ladder need to be put away after use.
        🙂

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        1. Zut alors! I had forgotten it!
          I also forgot one S.
          « the ladder needs to be put away after use » would have looked better, wouldn’t it?

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        1. Oh my word, can you imagine Blue the Smoke Bengal, Beefy Tabby Tigger, Ginger Goliath and the rest of the gang all coming round for a sniff?

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  4. Can you hammer a bit of raised chicken wire around the edges, making certain that it’s raised a couple of inches? It occurs to me that perhaps the royal rump finds the earth cooling; do you think that if he were provided a box with a bit of “seulment pour Catorze” plantings he would employ it instead?

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    1. Little sod has PLENTY of bare earth in the garden where he could choose to sit. He just doesn’t want to. 😐

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