This was supposed to be a relaxed and peaceful bank holiday weekend. However, our furry overlords had other ideas: just after I left for work yesterday, Equipe Oscar dealt Equipe Catorze a blistering equaliser. It’s now officially 1-1 in the battle of whatever it is that they’re battling about.

It seems that Louis Catorze finally dépassed la limite and Oscar, having decided that enough was enough, shimmied past the plant pot blockade at the end of his garden and set paw on Roi-occupied domain. After chasing the Sun King into Le Château, Oscar enjoyed not one but several laps of honour around Le Jardin whilst his antagonist watched him through the patio doors.

Dog Daddy tried to retrieve him, but he wouldn’t have it. (Well, have YOU ever succeeded in interrupting a punch-proud dog in the middle of a victory parade, especially when there’s a fence between you?) The more he was called, the more he ignored – so, after some text discussion between a frantic Dog Mamma and myself, Dog Daddy eventually had to let himself into Le Château with their spare keys and haul Oscar’s arse back home.

Cat Daddy more or less slept through the whole thing.

Louis Catorze is utterly unbothered by yesterday’s events, and is continuing to enjoy Le Jardin as much as he ever did. And both we and Oscar’s folks have laughed – a lot – about this. But, just to avoid any possibility of réinvasion, we will be planting a prickly, fast-growing shrub in the area where the perimeter was breached. La sécurité d’abord.